Hi James,

Thank you so very much for your feedback. I also appreciate you writing out how you might approach the narrator switching issue – that is so helpful.

It’s great to have you chime in on Katie’s feedback to me.

I appreciate this so much! So very very helpful!

Hi Katie,

Thank you so much for reading and for your feedback. I really appreciate this.

Can I ask a question, because I value your feedback…

You mention the theme being lost friendship, but that is secondary, not the theme. The theme (represented in the title and stated in 3 of the last 6 paragraphs) is losing a friend to the arrogance of believing she doesn’t need anyone, doesn’t need love. The crux of the piece is (was supposed to be, but maybe I didn’t make it clear enough?) that needing and loving people is a choice. Do you see a way to make that more clear?

So the cardinal represented choosing community, choosing togetherness.

Would love to understand what I did or didn’t do to make the theme unclear to you.

RE: changing the narrator from speaking of “she” to addressing her directly. I consciously wanted to try this and make it work. I felt as we neared the heart , the rub of the piece, I wanted to intensify the intimacy and immediacy. So the narrator spoke as if directly to her friend.

Yet it didn’t work for you and I respect that. I really appreciate you letting me know, I think I’ll play with it a bit to see what I could change there.

Thank you, Katie!!

Hi Lee,

You wrote “Royals Rulebook” which made me laugh!

You wrote: “She didn’t die in a car wreck, or cancer…” yes, that is the frustrating part. I appreciate your empathy in what you wrote. This friend has actually turned her back not only on me (her closest friend) but a shoe community of tight knit friends and family – all of us. I didn’t know how to work that into the story. I didn’t think there was a way. But now I am thinking I may need to find a way, because it is all the more bewildering. That is part of the story… so I should get it in there.

Thank you so much for you words and compassion. And writing feedback! 🙂

Hi Judith,

Thank you very much for the feedback. I will indeed prune! Glad you liked the cardinals.

I appreciate your time and feedback.

Thank you so much for taking the time to read and respond Brenda. Im definitely going to re-write and shorten at some point… when I’ve had more distance from the story and the situation.

Much Gratitude,

Margie

Hi Again, James… I responded to your very valuable feedback a few days ago, but just now realized I had not hit the correct “REPLY” button, so you may not have read it, I wanted to make sure you know how much I appreciate it, so am posting it agin:

“Hi James,

Thank you so very much for your feedback. I also appreciate you writing out how you might approach the narrator switching issue – that is so helpful.

It’s great to have you chime in on Katie’s feedback to me.

I appreciate this so much! So very very helpful!”

Thank you for reading and giving me feedback, Anne. I appreciate it!