Welcome! How exciting to have a writing couple. One of my favorite authors is actually another husband and wife team (Ilona Andrews), so I can guarantee this works. 🙂
Oooh, that’s good. The ending was powerful. I definitely feel like there’s a whole novel brewing behind this tidbit. I want to know what happens! I would give just one word of caution, and that’s to watch present/past tense.
Present tense: “The politician opens the top right drawer, takes out a file and places it in front of John.”
Past tense: “John took the file and left without another word.”
This is a challenging one! Yet, two people come to mind when I think of this question, both of whom seem to love my WIP even more than I do. I hadn’t thought about writing it for them, per se; I was worried what others (vague term, that) might think of it.
Welcome, Jyl! I’d like to thank you on behalf of all homeschooled students, by the way. 🙂 I was homeschooled from K-12, and it prepared me magnificently for college.
Utterly accurate. This kind of thing makes me shudder with empathy! 🙂 Just one small word of caution is to watch the perspective-switch. It went back and forth between her POV and narrative POV without any transition, and it threw me just a couple of times. But yow, I really liked this. I also want those shoes. 😉 Thanks so much for sharing it!
This is a LOVELY story! Yes, I agree it might be a God-thing. 🙂 The only bit that threw me out was a slight sense of detail check-list when it came to talking about the past. The more recent history was vibrant, and it flowed. I think the tiniest bit of editing would make this just perfect. I really appreciate you sharing this. We do serve a marvelous God! Thank you so much!
So interesting! It feels like the opening of a novel. I wanted to see more. The only thing that gave me slight pause (and only mentioned because we HAVE to say something we didn’t like) was the use of the word “had.” It threw me out of the rhythm, for some reason. However, I really like this story! I wish there were more.
Ahaha! That was a total surprise. Love the build-up! Love the twist ending! The only thing I didn’t like (because I HAVE to mention something, according to the rules) is I would have liked a little more at the end. I know the word-count limited that, but it felt just the tiniest bit rushed.
This is a tough question! Mostly, I do want to build a career and a faithful following. Would I love my book to be a best-seller, internationally or otherwise? Sure! But I’m not counting on that. 🙂 Mostly, I just want to get it OUT there. So far, when I get people’s attention, the response is mostly positive. It’s getting attention that’s the hardest part.
